The Past Six Months

I've gotten so far behind on posting . . . but, there are so many wonderful memories I want to write down.

Something really cool happened back in May.  A friend from my neighborhood asked her husband for a "girl getaway" for her birthday.  So, he booked this amazing vacation home in Ogden Valley that had a giant living room, tons of beds, a hot tub and its own indoor pool.  Their family went up alone for one night, then he took their kids home and she invited all of her girlfriends to stay the next two nights.

It was a beautiful, relaxing time.  We had a bunco night, movies, games, delicious food and lots of down time for a giant group of lovely ladies.  I felt really blessed to be a part of it.

Our summer started out with a bang!  As soon as school got out, Brian and my parents and I loaded up the kids and drove to Disneyland for four unforgettable days at the park and an equally extraordinary day at the beach.  This will be fully memorialized in a separate post complete with pictures.

Our amusement park fun continued as we enjoyed our Lagoon passes. Around the beginning of August I heard Ian tell a friend that we had been to Lagoon 20-30 times with our passes.  We hadn't been anywhere near that many times, but I LOVED that he thought we had.  I was able to take the kids to Frightmares twice.  I knew the second time would be our last visit for the season.  But, it was so much fun it made me wish we could go one more time.  The next week, my mom surprised me by taking Ian and Isaac on a weeknight (they were open weeknights leading up to Halloween).  I couldn't tell who was more excited about the short lines and all of the rides they were able to get on -- them or her!  I love my mom and how much fun she is.

Another exciting event in our summer was when Brian's parents returned from their two-year mission to the Philippines.  So great to have them back!  We celebrated with family gatherings, including a sibling/spouse dinner at Maddox Steakhouse -- one of my most favorite restaurants.

Here is a tender mercy story I want to share.

When we bought our house three years ago, instead of selling our old house we carried the financing for lease-to-own buyers.

When Brian's parents left on their mission, they generously offered to let us drive their natural gas 12-passenger van.  This was great for so many reasons.  For one, I loved having all of those seat belts.  For another, it allowed us to sell our silver Honda minivan (which we owned) giving us some needed equity to start on the many home improvements our home required.

Of course, life never goes quite the way you plan.  Just when we were looking into buying another van, our lease-to-own buyers called to tell us they were moving to Colorado. Adding an extra mortgage and a car payment to our list of expenses at the same time wasn't sounding good.

As I recorded earlier, my Pappa (Grandfather) passed away in July.  When I went out for the funeral, my mom and her three siblings were discussing what to do with all of his vehicles, and it turned out my dad was able to drive one of my Pappa's vans from Kentucky to Utah for Brian and I to use!

My parents arrived back in Utah with the van the same night Brian's parents returned from the Philippines.  It makes me feel really blessed when I think about it.

Now we have a 7-passenger van.  It's about the same size as the 12-passenger, so there is lots of leg room.  Watch out for this Nicholson family and our vans!  I can't wait to take it on a road trip.

Summer was really special this year.  My kids were old enough that I wasn't completely exhausted (13, 11, 8 and 5).  But, they were still young enough that they thought Disneyland and hanging out with the family were cool.

I tried to soak in the moments as much as possible.  Really, I did.  There were two times that I got to take the kids to Lagoon-a-Beach (Lagoon's water park).  Katie and Isaac wanted to stay by me in the giant lazy river.  They don't make them like that anymore -- twisting around the entire park, through a cave, and with giant waterfalls along the way.  Isaac had his own tube, but, Katie was my motor.  She was so cute, hanging on to the handle of my tube steering me around.  I wanted to bottle up how much love I felt for those two in those moments and savor it forever.

It is one of those seasons of my life where I wish time would pause.  I'm really enjoying the journey right now.

We missed out on Moosehorn -- the annual Nicholson reunion in the Uintahs.  It's the first time we've completely missed it since the first year it happened, when Sophie was a few months old.  It fell during a particularly busy week in August, right when our buyers moved out.  We were hoping to go up for one day, but, in the end we decided to put all of our efforts into getting our old house ready to be listed.  We had high hopes that it would sell that month!  Now it is November and it's still listed - haha!  But, it's alright.  We feel optimistic and we have adjusted our price so that it will hopefully sell quickly.  Before Christmas would be nice.

We did, however, make a quick 24-hour trip to our favorite cabin on the beach at Bear Lake.  It was exquisite as always.  I will miss that cabin so much!  It will be sold soon and we will have to make a new Bear Lake tradition.

Right before the kids went back to school, Brian and I were asked to create a 65-page publication for the National Hispanic Chamber of Commerce Convention that was held in Salt Lake City in September.  It was a very exciting project.  I am so proud of how it turned out.

Working on it made me feel like I did when I had a newborn.  No time to shower or take care of myself at all.  The house was a mess and I barely got any sleep for a three-week span.  I wrote all but three of the stories and Brian took almost all of the photographs and did the layout and design.  It was exciting to talk to so many successful business owners in Utah about why this is a great place to live.

I agree.  I'm kind of a nerd when it comes to thinking Utah as a fabulous place.

As soon as I awoke from this whirlwind of winding up summer, getting the kids back to school, celebrating Isaac's 9th birthday, and completing the magazine, it was already a week into September.

I forgot to add that right before we finished the magazine, we spent a couple of days with some friends at a cabin in the Uintahs.  It was a much needed change of pace for us.  I felt like I was breathing and drinking in the relaxation.  Completely unplugged.  We suddenly had some very serious business of putting together 1,000 piece puzzles and watching our kids on the zip line.  Absolute heaven.

So--it was September and I desperately needed to start getting dressed again instead of wearing my version of sweats (workout clothes) all day every day.  My house needed lots of attention.  My kids needed lots of attention.  There were many things to focus on, yet I somehow found myself planning a 5K fundraiser for the junior high.

Well--because I am the PTA president this year and the school needed money and although I tried hard to make it go away, it didn't.  So, in the end, Brian, I, and a handful of volunteers just put ourselves out there and did it.  The run was on Nov. 1 and we were able to raise more than $4,000 for the school.  Even though I was so stressed about how we would find the time to make it happen (and, I even had my first real life chest pains where I thought I might be having a heart attack in the middle of the night right after we said we would go ahead and do it), I can now say that it was an awesome experience and I am glad we did it.

It was very heartwarming to see so many sponsors from the community hand over support to our school.  It feels good knowing that a few of us who didn't have the time and didn't know what we were doing were able to rally and raise money that was needed.  I think we may even have to do it again next year.

The other thing that happened in September is that I kind of, sort of, got laid off.

I mean -- freelancers can't really get laid off because they aren't really employed.  But, I have had a very regular gig with the Standard Examiner as an entertainment writer for the past 15-years.  For the past year, I was pretty much the only entertainment correspondent and the regular writer for the restaurant and theater beats.  They even listed my name in the front of the Friday entertainment section with the regular staffers for the first time.  But, there have been a lot of weird shake-ups at the newspaper. Things have been especially turbulent for the past year and a half.  There have been a lot of lay-offs and cuts and this time they had to cut the entertainment freelance budget due to advertising cuts.  Now, I only cover a dining story once a week.

It's the way things are for the print newspaper business these days.

My emotions about this are hard to put into words.  For months leading up to this news, Brian and I had actually had numerous discussions about feeling like I was more needed in the home.  I felt it strongly in my heart and Brian agreed.  Our home, our kids, our family needed more of my focus and attention than I was able to give as long as I was running a daycare five days a week and writing 5-6 stories every week.  It had been so very long since I had had a single day, including weekends, when I didn't have to work on stories.

That is probably the biggest reason I am never available to update this blog.  I like to write -- But, I'm doing it all day every day people!

We even met with the bishop and I told him the desires of my heart.  I mostly expected him to say, "Pull your head out of the clouds darlin'.  Those kids need food on the table, not some daydreaming, idealistic mother who reads them bedtime stories and takes them to the park."  But, he didn't.  He said I needed to really listen to those feelings.  I was so relieved by his advice.  I left his office feeling calm and happy.  But, then what?

Was I suppose to quit babysitting?  Was I suppose to quit writing?  It didn't feel right to just quit when we had not plan B in place.  Plus, I love the kids I watch and I love writing for the newspaper.  It's interesting though, that when you take a lot of different things that you love and try to do them all at the same time, it can be hard to love any of it.

So, really, when the newspaper told me, it felt like the right thing.  I mean, it could not have possibly been more unexpected.  It blindsided me.  It was,  in many ways, devastating.  For about a week, I didn't know what to think.  Was I suppose to look for another job?  Was I suppose to celebrate?

In one way, it was a relief to no longer have to go, go, go every single day.  But, in another way, it was hard because, of course, I want the newspaper to be like, "We love you so much and we can't live without you and we would be crushed if you didn't do what you do every day."  That would be nice.  And, paychecks are nice.

I know the editor I work for directly was sad.  It was something that came from higher up, from people I have never met and who don't know me from a complete stranger.  So, whatever.

Heavenly Father knew what I needed.  And, after I had the adequate amount of time for that to wash over me, life has become so beautiful.  We still have two mortgages and it's a little bit scary to lose that pretty substantial paycheck.  But, everything feels so much more peaceful and balanced and I am optimistic to see what is to come.