Denver 2012

In March we went to Denver for Sophie's state report on Colorado.

One family that we are very close to took all of their kids on road trips to complete their county and state reports (in nearby states like Arizona and Nevada).

Our other good friends have followed suit, and even flew their whole family to New York for a state report.

Note:  We will not be traveling to New York for a state report. 

But, Colorado we can do.  Brian and I decided it's a fun tradition that makes the kids feel really special and so we will do it whenever it is feasible.  Plus, it was a great excuse to visit family in Denver.

Sophie's state report was due in March and my sweet sister-in-law "Can" was due with her fifth child, my beautiful niece Olivia, at the beginning of February.  We collaborated and Can was so accommodating to let us come visit so soon after the new baby (and, amazingly all of the planets came into alignment so that no one got sick and Brian and I were both able to swing our work schedules and the kids didn't have any commitments that couldn't be broken all in the same weekend!).

We woke up early in the morning and had a beautiful drive down through Utah and over into Colorado.  I know this route is a tiny bit longer, but it is so scenic, I think it is worth it.  Even the kids were mesmerized by our colorful surroundings.

When we arrived, Can had a delicious meal waiting for us and the cousins got busy playing together -- the part our kids would later say was the highlight of our vacation.

The next day, we loaded up our families and headed downtown for a walking tour.  The first stop was the capitol (the photo above was taken on the steps).  I think everyone's favorite part was the popcorn break on the lower level.  And, we had a perfect picnic on the lawn.  The weather was just right.  Beautiful spring days that feel even more luxurious at the end of a long winter.

(The kids enjoying the weather and the swingset in their cousins' huge backyard)

We walked the streets of downtown Denver, admiring the architecture, touring the Brown Palace (an ornate historic hotel), buying treats at the chocolate factory along the 16th Street Mall and riding escalators.  Simple pleasures.

Our final stop was the gift shop at the Denver Mint.  We had been unable to secure tickets for a tour, but the kids looked around and we bought a few souvenirs.

Then we were off the Casa Bonita, a Mexican restaurant with indoor cliff diving that was built in the 70s.  It was cheesy and a little rundown and the food was sub-par but the kids LOVED it, so we were glad we went.  At home that night, the older cousins had a slumber party.

The next day, we took the kids to a fabulous park where they played for hours in the sunshine.  Then we had a picnic (picnics are great for large groups I've decided) and headed to the Science and Nature Museum.

If you are going to Denver with kids, I highly recommend this place.  We spent hours in an exhibit exploring the human body, saw mummies, looked at live reptiles, roamed below towering dinosaurs and visited a space exhibit that has pretty much everything the Clarke Planetarium in Salt Lake has. 

After stopping back by the house for pizza, we all headed to Yogurt Land (or, Yogurt World?) so the kids could pile on whatever toppings they desired and eat sugar to their heart's content.

It was the perfect ending to the perfect vacation.

The next day, we drove home via Wyoming to save time.  It was about an hour faster, but Wyoming was so windy that we had to nix our plans to stop at a park and ate our lunch in the van instead.  I think the two different routes are a toss up as to which is better.  The kids did like to see the windmill farm though there wasn't very much else in the long stretches of driving in between.

We had a great time and mostly I loved how all of my kids were instant best friends with their cousins who they only get to see a few times a year. 

Thanks Can and James and family!

Happy Valentine's Day!

(Isaac with a cookie he decorated himself)

My Sophie has a crush.

There is a boy in her grade who makes her heart skip a beat. In the third grade, while practicing square dancing, she happened to be partnered with this boy and later told me that "it felt like being on a roller coaster ride."

Sometimes I find his name with hearts scribbled on little notes tucked around her room.

It is very sweet.

I told her that whatever she does she must not reveal her crush to him (or anyone who would tell him). Because we all know that this makes elementary school boys shout the word "cooties" and run the opposite direction.

She has played it cool.

The 5th grade went on an ice-skating field trip today. Sophie has been looking forward to it for weeks - deciding what to wear and wanting to look cute on the ice for her crush.

Two weeks ago, he folded a Chinese star out of origami paper and gave it to her. She took this as a sign that he likes her too. Could it be?

Last night, Isaac cried at bedtime because I couldn't come to his class Valentine's Day party. I helped with Sophie's Halloween party in the fall and today I helped with Ian's Valentine's party - and, darn it that the class parties all take place at the same time. So, what is a mom with more than one kid to do? I reminded him that I helped with his 100th Day of School party. But, he was still sad.

At Ian's party, his best friend Oliver found a sticky foam heart that said "Best Friends." He cut it in half with a crooked line and stuck one half on his shirt and the other half on Ian's shirt and they stood side by side to show me. It reminded me of the "Best Friend" broken lockets that were popular when I was his age. I love that they are young enough to do something goofy like that and I love that Ian has a best friend.

They are good for each other. At the party, the kids made guys out of the heart cards from a deck of poker cards by attaching red pipe cleaners for the arms and legs and drawing on a little face. Ian's guy was as straight forward as could be with the pipe cleaners attached in straight lines and a simple smiley face. His best friend Oliver bent the arms and legs all crazy and added foam hearts for feet so it could stand. Then, he made a wicked face with pointy teeth and named his guy "death." That pretty much sums up Ian and Oliver. Ian is a serious little thinker and Oliver is as creative of a kid as I've ever met. That's why they are so good for each other.

Tonight we are having our traditional Valentine dinner. My mom is joining us. I'm so excited! Everything came together so quickly this year. Usually, I'm running around trying to clean up the house at the last minute, but this year I'm writing this blog post and everything is ready to roll in 30-minutes.

We have a lovely centerpiece of hearts and we will be eating heart shaped sloppy joes with veggies and pink ranch dip. For dessert, there are heart shaped sugar cookies. The kids frosted them after school yesterday. It's another of our traditions. I just love Valentine's Day.

This year, I took everything off my tree after Christmas and re-decorated it with white lights, red hearts, snow flakes, red berry garland and silver and red ornaments. It was our first Valentine's tree and I rather liked it. I think it looked even better than our Christmas tree which has become a hodge podge of random trinkets over the years. I do love the vintage mitten garland and the colorful lights, but I'm questioning the tradition that Brian and I started on our Honeymoon to buy a Christmas ornament every time we travel. It has led us to a somewhat sentimental tree that has no theme whatsoever. I liked the simplicity of the red, silver and white tree.

In our old house, I was always anxious to take the tree down after Christmas since our space was so small though I've always thought that December 26 is just too soon. There are so many long days of winter left before spring. So, we enjoyed the tree for six extra weeks this year and I officially declare that the middle of February is just the right time to take down the tree.

(I just undecorated it and took it down before I started writing this - it was time)

Accepting What Is

The birth of each of my kids had taught me something and changed me for the better.

Sophie unlocked my mother's heart and awakened a feminine side of me that I had never fully known.

Ian showed me that I had more strength than I ever thought possible. The kind of power that propelled me to run half marathons when I had thought running a mile to be a feat in itself. It is a wonderful thing to know how strong we really are.

With Isaac's birth came a new level of calm and patience that got us through those first years of having three kids in four years. Come to think of it, that boy is still teaching me about patience.

Then, came Katie. And, for more than two and a half years I have wondered what lesson I learned from her birth. Today, I think I finally figured it out.

Katie has been teaching me a lesson that takes a long time to learn. And, I suspect it will take even take more time to master than opening a mother's heart, tapping into inner strength or increasing the reservoir of patience. I think that Katie is teaching me to accept what is happening in the present moment of life.

I often think back to my first trimester of pregnancy with this sweet little girl, when the other three were still little, and I found myself overtaken with daily migraines. It just about broke my heart to lie still in a darkened room and ask my seven year old Sophie to please look after her brothers for a few hours until I could pull together enough of that inner strength to make dinner.

It was hard and I hated not being there for my other three children as much as I wanted to be while I struggled with the physical challenges that continued through the pregnancy. I kept telling myself, "This is not forever. Just a few more days (or weeks) and everything will be fine again."

But, those days and weeks stretched into months. At last, our angel Katie Jane was born. But, the struggles did not end. They stretched on for years as I found myself completely overwhelmed with caring for four. Anyone who says "Once you master caring for three, it's a cinch to have more," is dead wrong in my opinion. From the beginning of my pregnancy onward, I have felt like my whole world was thrown out of balance.

I don't want to sound ungrateful - I would of course be devastated if anything happened to any of my children, I love them SO much.

In the months that followed Katie's birth I found myself thinking on several occasions -- "If I had only two kids, I could be a great mom. Pick two. Any two. My two oldest. Great mom. My two youngest. Same. One older and one younger. Any combo - great mom. I just know it!"

Don't get me wrong - I could never give up two of my kids now that they are here. I was just a little second guessing my decision to bring them all here in the first place.

It's a lot of people to pay attention to. And, a lot of nails to trim. I think after Katie was born I started to have a greater self awareness, in other words it was time for me to lose 40-pounds, pay more attention to my health, organize my home, etc. And, I realized that it takes a lot of focus just to take care of myself. How on earth could I be responsible for taking care of four other people too?

I was sure that I would be a better mom if only I didn't babysit as much. Sure it was hard taking care of seven kids, but I could probably do it if I just had my four. I would be a better mom if I wasn't so tired/stressed out/had to work so much . . . All of these things and more I have fantasized about and told myself that I could do better - if.

I feel like I blinked and suddenly Sophie and Ian were big kids. I mean, they both wear the same size shoe as me and their issues with friends and life are more complicated than they use to be.

In a nutshell, this has been a challenging three years for me. And, I have spent a lot of time looking back to that first wave of migraines when I thought everything would be alright in a few days and wished I could go back to my seven, five and three year old darlings and take better care of them from that time to the present. And, I've spent a few nights lying awake thinking that surely I've completely failed at everything I've tried to do in terms of my home and family.

Which isn't to say that Katie Jane hasn't been one of the brightest spots and most wonderful blessings in our lives. It's just been the whole package that's been a challenge to deal with.

Last week I finally made the time to meet my kids at their school for lunch. It was a great experience to see them there, in their element, with their friends, having the routines they have every day while we are apart. I cherished the moment.

As I left the school, I started the fantasy of, "If only I didn't have work so much, I could meet my kids for lunch more often. I wish I could meet the kids for lunch more often." And, then I stopped and asked myself, "Do I really wish that?" Because maybe I don't. Maybe I like spending an hour writing a story better than I would like meeting the kids for lunch more often. Maybe the amount of time I spend meeting them for lunch is just right. Maybe even the number of hours I spend cleaning the house is just right. Maybe all of it is exactly the number of hours I really do want to spend doing each activity.

And, so this morning, as Katie sat on top of the bathroom counter top watching me put on makeup and wanting to put it on herself too, she grabbed hold of a pink lipstick and applied it to her lips before I could stop her. She sat staring at her pink lipped reflection and I stared at it too. What would our lives be without this special angel who has come into our lives?

And suddenly I realized, "I have to start accepting what is."

This is my life. And, it's pretty wonderful. I've got to stop worrying about the past and feeling anxious about the future or wishing for this or that and just love myself and my family the way we are in this moment.

And loving this moment.

I think that is the gift Katie brought to me.

Acceptance.

Bedtime Prayers

It's common practice for our kids to say they are thankful for everyone in the family (naming each one by name) during our evening family prayers. But, last night, Isaac -- in his typical way of putting his own twist on everything -- said the prayer this way, "We are thankful that mommy, daddy, Ian, Sophie, Katie and me were invented."

Home Rennovations

When we bought this house, it was hard to know where to begin with the home renovations.

Plumbing wormed its way to the top of the list when we realized that was a pre-requisite to moving in. But, once the plumbing was finished, followed by a long list of odds and ends, we had to settle on which large project to focus on next.

The sprinkler system and landscaping will have to wait until spring, and the new roof and new windows will have to wait until we officially sell our other house and get the equity. Other things, like the patio with a hot tub in the backyard off the family room (aka party room), and putting in our dream kitchen are even further down the list (and maybe on a list labeled "fantasy" or "for when we get insane amounts of unforeseen income").

Brian convinced me that the most worthwhile large scale project at present was enlarging two of the four downstairs windows to make two more bedrooms. Have you ever done this before? It is an amazing process! Holy cow! First, we dug two enormous holes outside of the existing windows (then, while we waited for the bids to come in on having the concrete cut, all of the rain caused the holes to partially collapse and Brian had to re-dig them).

Today, the concrete cutting company came and spent the entire day using their enormous saw to cut right through our foundation. The result is two enormous holes more then 4 times as large as the original windows. I am stoked! I can't believe the difference all of the natural light has already made in the basement. Now, Brian is working on putting the windows into the holes. And, I hope that in the very near future he will decide that putting a few of our walls and ceilings back together is the next most important project. I think he likes the demolition the best ;-).

This and That 2012

(the kids watching a stunning sunset from our front room)

(Kate graces us with a smile - her idea, no doubt)

A word about Katie Jane who gave me a fabulous gift for Christmas -- she decided to be potty trained! At last . . . nearly eleven years into this parenting saga, we are out of diapers!!!

If I thought Katie was an independent spirit before this latest milestone - 'Noooooooo, lemme do it!' - learning to use the potty has only increased her desire to do everything by herself. She has an elaborate balancing and climbing system worked out so that she doesn't need any help getting up on the big potty (she was done with that little potty after the first week and thanked me when I hauled it off to the D.I.). She insists on dressing herself - usually several times per day - which involves about twenty minutes of wrestling with her clothes. But, heaven forbid I should so much as turn a sleeve right side out during the process and she starts all over again.

She's getting pretty good at the dressing part, and watch out, because that girl has got some pretty progressive fashion ideas. She is suddenly really in to wearing 'skirts,' as in those fluffy princess skirts that have been collecting in her drawers over the years (they are just too hard to pass up when I see them in the stores). She even wears one over her blanket sleeper at night. And, it's a good thing she has a closet full of shoes, because she loves trying out different pairs with each outfit (and, she wears those to bed over her blanket sleepers on occasion too). The other day, after she had changed clothes a few times, she was wearing a shirt with leggings and a skirt over the top and when she did a somersault I realized she had gotten the underwear on the outside of the pants. Oops! And, adorable.

Miss Kate has been way too independent to snuggle with her mama since, oh, about the age of 9-months. So, you can imagine how thrilled I am that she has recently started climbing into my bed in the middle of the night. She tiptoes down the hall and sleepily asks to sleep with me. I pull her right in between Brian and me -- princess skirt, blanket sleeper, light up snowboots and all -- and we snuggle for a few hours. Then, she wakes up and realizes she is not in her own bed and that independent little spirit of mine jumps up and heads back down the hall. We didn't let our other kids sleep in our bed by the time they were as old as Katie, but I sort of love it.

(Sophie, left, with her cousin Tyla, right, on a hike with extended family near our home after Christmas)

You can't imagine how proud I am of Sophie. She is selling Girl Scout cookies, and she has been working SO hard! One of the incentives for selling is an ipad. You just have to sell 2,500 boxes in two weeks. No big deal, right? She decided to make that her goal and she gets out there and knocks on doors every chance she gets. We hit the pavement for several hours on Saturday and Monday and we've gone out after school Tuesday and Wednesday. She has a special "cookie selling pen" to record orders, and she puts on these pink glasses I bought for a Halloween costume because they make her look "cheery," then she suits up in her Girl Scout vest and adds a sock monkey hat for warmth and we are off! I think more people buy cookies when I carry Katie on my back while we sell, but maybe that is just my imagination.

Last night, she even insisted on selling in the rain! I wimped out and drove alongside her in the van while my poor girl got soaking wet and struggled with the wind blowing her umbrella inside out. (note: people don't feel sorry for a Girl Scout selling in the rain, almost everyone said 'no' last night!!!). But, she didn't give up. She has already sold 342 boxes - which I think it very impressive. She has worked SO hard and I felt kind of bad last night when she asked in a super excited voice, "So - how many more boxes do I need to sell to meet my goal!?" Ummmm, only 2,158 more boxes to go sweetie.

She might be sad to not get her ipad, but horse camp is (hopefully) going to be (mostly) paid for.

How cool is a week-long camp with horseback riding?

(crazy hair day last fall -- Isaac insisted on the pink pigtails)

Speaking of being proud, I was also really proud of Ian a few weeks ago when Isaac lost his first tooth. Just FYI - Ian is an amazing saver of his $. Another FYI - Isaac is not Ian's favorite person due to their vastly different personalities.

Back to the story of Isaac losing his first tooth -- the next morning we were all surprised (Brian and I most of all) when Isaac found not $3 but $6 under his pillow! Ian said with a sneaky grin, "Mom, come on, it's his first lost tooth."

I knew there was a soft spot somewhere in that sweet guy's heart for his brother.

And, while we are on the topic of Isaac, he is going through an "I love you," stage in which he writes love notes to me all day long. I have piles and piles of them. And, every time he finds a heart shape (for example, a spot in the snow that melted into the shape of a heart) he calls me over to show it to me and says, "that is for you."

He has turned into quite the scholar (as well as charming lover boy) and is loving Kindergarten this year. They have only practiced writing their first names so far, but, being the little over-achiever he is, he tries to write his full name on his papers and it looks like this:

Isaac Briin Nislkin

I love it!!!

I guess it's time to tell him his last name isn't really Nislkin. I haven't wanted to correct him all these years. It's kind of like the way Sophie use to say "mazagine" when she was little. So endearing.

Welcome 2012

Top tips to a successful New Year's Eve Party with the kids (and their friends):

1) A cotton candy machine. I'm not sure which was more fun for the kids, making the cotton candy or eating it.

2) Lots of snacks. The nice thing about kids is that they are pretty easy when it comes to party food. One of the biggest hits was the individual chip bags.

3) Games. In addition to the air hockey and wii, we broke up the night by coming together for party games like "Spoons" now and then. We also assigned each kid a number and drew from a bowl every 15 minutes for prizes.

4) Origami. I just discovered that Michael's is a good place to stock up on origami paper -- 200 sheets for $10. Sophie checked out a bunch of books with instructions from the library and the kids went crazy folding.

5) Geometric shapes. After writing a story for the newspaper last month about activities for the kids with cranberries, I bought a few bags (but, then never did any of the things I was planning to do). Last night, I busted out the cranberries and a box of toothpicks and was amazed at how the kids -- especially the Kindergarten crowd -- sat mesmerized for hours building elaborate bridges and pyramids. Pure magic.

6) Music. We kept the music pumping with tunes the 9-11 year-olds loved. This created a nice party atmosphere and I think it was a hit, since the volume was increased every time my back was turned. Plus, the two-year-olds and I made up a new dance in which we all held hands and jumped up and down repeatedly. It was awesome to see their giggles and I think it may have been good for my calves as well.

7) A fire. We've started using the fireplace in our front room and it is everything I ever dreamed about when I imagined having a home with a nice cozy fireplace. Around 9 p.m., Katie Jane curled up with her blankets and pillows and fell asleep watching the flames dance about. It was so sweet. And, I couldn't believe she never stirred with all the partying going on nearby.

8) A movie. Even with all the music, treats, games and prizes, it was still a long night. At 9:30 p.m. we popped in the DVD of the newest Spy Kids movie and nestled the kids in with soft blankets and buttered popcorn. Then, some of our friends showed up (Brian's brother who is visiting from Boston was also brave enough to join our crazy house full of kids), so while the kids were quietly entertained with a movie, the grown-ups had a rousing game of Cranium in the next room. I will never forget the moment when -- right before our super smart friends won the game like they always do -- one of them accidentally blurted out "Three fish, four fish" to finish the phrase "One fish, two fish . . . " Maybe you just had to be there. (side note: their nursery is decorated in Dr. Seuss with the correct phrase stenciled on the wall!).

9) Sparklers. At 11:50 p.m., we gathered up the ten out of the fifteen kids who had stayed awake long enough to see the new year and helped them put on their coats and shoes. We decorated them heavily with glow bracelets and necklaces, armed them with poppers and herded them outside where we counted down to midnight and lit sparklers. All ten of the kids were lining the balcony overlooking our driveway waving their sparklers while I was stood below watching their smiling faces. It was a lovely way to start 2012.

10) Fireworks. Just as our crew was waving their sparklers and blowing their horns, a neighbor launched a gorgeous fireworks display into the air. Unexpected and oh so perfect!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!