This month has been a marathon of awesome events, including one actual marathon. I'm going to do my best to write it all down as fast as I can so I don't forget.
May is the month that sneaks up on you. It is as busy as December and in some cases (such as this year) much much busier. Which can be difficult to explain to your childless boss and co-worker why you are suddenly so inundated with events in your personal life. They have been supportive nonetheless.
I think I will go in order from oldest to youngest.
May was a busy month for Brian who, for the first time, is on the GOAL staff who puts on the Ogden Marathon the 3rd weekend in May. He was so busy the two weeks leading up to the marathon, and barely had time to sleep (leaving the house at 5 am and working past 10 pm) on the Thursday, Friday and Saturday of the marathon.
The GOAL staff is not allowed to participate in the marathon since this huge event requires all hands on deck as well as hundreds of community volunteers. However, this year was Brian's chance to run the Ogden Marathon for the 10th time -- qualifying him for the 10-year club. This is a club of people who have run the Ogden Marathon 10 or more times and they are honored at a fancy pasta dinner at Zucca a few nights before the marathon. His staff graciously agreed to let him run the race one last time so he could secure his membership.
We all hoped for beautiful weather since the marathon has been rainy and cold in 2014 and 2015, so it's getting kind of a bad rap. Saturday morning we woke up to a downpour. Sad. Especially for Brian who had to run in buckets of rain for over four hours and who has to market this race that has now been a severe test of endurance due to the weather for runners for three years in a row.
Aside from the weather, the race was another huge success. Way to go Brian and way to go GOAL and way to go Ogden!
I am so proud of Sophie. In the month of May she worked her new summer job at Lagoon, performed in the Little Mermaid Jr. at the Ziegfeld Theater eight times, appearing as the mersister Aquata, a princess, a pink flamingo and a jelly fish. The mersister role was definitely the largest role she has had in a play to date and included some singing solos. She was darling doing all of her parts and the show turned out so colorful and cute. I am really impressed with the director and what she was able to pull out of the kids.
Sophie did all of this while also preparing for a school play that opens tonight (only a few days after the Little Mermaid closed). Anyone who has participated in theater knows this has meant a lot of long days going directly from school to rehearsals and performances that have lasted sometimes until after 10 p.m., even on school nights.
A musical, a play and her first summer job -- all while finishing up her first year of high school and staying on the honor role. Like I said, so proud of this girl!
Ian reaches the landmark of his final day of 7th grade today. He has had a fantastic first year of junior high. He has so many good friends and I am grateful for that in his life.
Before school began, the band teacher reluctantly agreed to let Ian join the 8th grade (advanced) band instead of having to first complete a year in beginning band since he has had so many years of piano and is good at reading music. He was starting on a new instrument -- drums -- but he put in the time to get caught up to his peers and by the first test he earned first chair.
He continued to do well and by mid-year, the band teacher signed him out of his required keyboarding class for 2nd semester so that he could join the jazz band and play bass guitar -- another new instrument.
At first Ian was bummed out that he couldn't play keyboard or drums (those instruments were taken by other students and he kind of got pushed into being the bass guitarist). He would come home and lament that he couldn't show off on his instrument like the other students since he didn't know how to play it yet.
I was so proud of him when I went to his band concert earlier this month and that kid rocked it! He is awesome on the bass guitar already and I am excited to see where he will go with it next year. It meant a lot to my dad who has helped pay for his piano lessons over the years to see him perform.
We also got to attend the honors banquet with him for being on the honor roll all year. I am so proud of Ian's musical accomplishments and of all of my kids for working hard to keep their grades up.
Ian was also allowed to skip 8th grade math and go straight into the 9th grade math class next year because he has been such an outstanding mathematician. He completed the entire 7th and 8th grade online curriculums halfway through they year and then started the 9th grade curriculum. There are a handful of 7th graders who are skipping straight to 9th grade math. Ian is the only one out of his entire school of over 900 kids to complete two grades worth of online topics and more than fifty 9th grade topics in one year. He had to look up youtube videos to teach him the concepts as it became more and more complicated. What a guy!
Isaac's 4th grade year had a rough start and ups and downs but ended on a totally high note. He passed all of his sage tests with flying colors (his teacher and I were both holding our breath). He was honored earlier this month in an assembly where his teacher named him student of the month for his good behavior and hard work academically.
This is what his teacher had to say about him:
"Isaac is an amazing young man! He is passionate about learning about the world around him. He has millions of facts and details he has read about swirling in his head and can add to every lesson with these facts. I admire his desire to learn. My favorite thing about Isaac is the twinkle in his eye - he has such a funny sense of humor; but he usually says it so straight-faced that I have learned to look for that "twinkle" to see if he is teasing me. Isaac makes my day happy every single day!"
She has truly loved him and brought out the best in him. I am so grateful. His positive attitude has also spilled over into home life prompting him to work on some goals (like shoe tying) that he has been stubborn about in the past. I am so proud of him!
The other day, he and his friend filled a whole outdoor trash can with weeds they pulled for fun. I love it.
He was also given an award at the end of year assembly yesterday. The teachers each picked three students in their class who had been outstanding for one reason or another and Isaac was one of the three his teacher chose.
My darling Katie Jane turned seven this week. She has been counting down since about January 1. When she woke up on the morning of her birthday, she started counting down to eight!
She has worked so hard at DaVinci Distance and home school and finished the year strong. Yesterday, I went to her science fair in the morning where she gave an amazing presentation on how volcanos erupt and then, yes, we did erupt a volcano that the class had made together. We erupted it over and over and the kids loved it more and more each time.
After that, I went to Isaac's school to see him get his award. Then it was straight back to Katie's school for an end of the year BBQ celebration at the park. The day was jam packed with fun and yet we were just beginning.
At 2:30, we picked up three of Katie's friends and headed up to a petting farm (Carver's Cove) in Ogden Valley. It was a magical place. There were goats, llamas, alpacas, miniature donkeys, miniature horses, wild mustangs, bunnies, geese, pigs, turkeys, cats, cows and the most friendly sheep dog named Tess. The kids could walk around and pet and feed all of the animals. They got to ride on a horse. We saw piglets that were born earlier that day and two baby goats that were born five minutes earlier. There was a baby lamb, a baby horse, baby cows, more baby goats -- tons of cute babies since it is spring.
My heart was so touched when Isaac broke away from the group to give the last of his food to the momma goat who had just given birth. She took a break from cleaning her babies to eat it. He is so thoughtful.
The kids had fun with the animals. I loved how excited they were -- even about the friendly cats. Then we went to a fancy cupcake shop for a treat and to open gifts. I think it was a pretty fun birthday celebration.
More end of year celebrating today as it is Ian and Isaac's last day of school. I will see Sophie's play tonight. She has school through next Friday. Ian's piano recital is next week. It has been a very full and very wonderful month. I am so excited for our adventures this summer.
Thursday, May 26, 2016
Monday, May 9, 2016
Suicide
Chad and Dori moved into out ward while we were living in China. It was ten years ago that we returned from our travels abroad to our house on 25th street to meet these new ward members -- Dori, a spicy red-head, and her husband Chad who was bald and had the same glasses as Brian, creating enough resemblance between the two that sometimes our youngest kids would walk up to the wrong "dad."
I was instantly attracted to Dori's zesty and honest personality. She was so intelligent and had interesting insights on every topic. Chad was one of the most creative people I had met. He was always creating elaborate holiday decorations for their home, themed parties for Weber State University, and their family always had the best Halloween costumes around.
When I met Dori she was working as an independent grant writer for the city while trying to juggle a large and very young family. When she and Chad married, Dori already had a daughter. They decided they would have two more kids together -- which they did in rapid succession. With three children, they felt their family was complete. But, another baby came soon after that. When birth control failed them a second time and their fifth child was born, Dori opted to have her tubes tied. Crazy story is that she somehow conceived a sixth child. Her first daughter was about seven years older than the kids Chad and Dori had together. The five kids they had together were born in seven years and three of them were unexpected.
I am sure it was challenging to balance all of this, but Chad and Dori did it with smiles on their faces, using humor to keep going through the daily struggles and uplifting the people around them all the time.
I know all of this because, as I mentioned before, Dori had a very open and honest personality and shared so many things. She shared the marital challenges that she and Chad had which, quite frankly blew my mind as I learned about all they had been through. At one point when they were separated, we had a conversation during which Dori was gasping for breath and crying so hard. He had done things that I don't know if I could forgive. It was hard for her to forgive too. But, she loved him so much. Instead of being angry, (I'm sure she was angry too), she expressed hurt down to the tips of her toes and just unfathomable anguish at being separated from her soulmate, her true love, her best friend in the entire world.
They made it through some of the toughest struggles I've ever known of married couples to face. They had both had difficult childhoods, and their love for each other as they created a beautiful life for their own family was evident, even if they were not perfect individuals. In fact, the openness and honesty about their imperfections made them all the more endearing in this world where life is so very, very messy and real.
I loved Dori for her cheeky sass and I loved Chad for his kindness. They both had so much positive energy and optimism for life and infectious smiles. I loved their brood of freckle faced kids. I loved their love story that endured all things and fought hard to keep going and to truly forgive and to keep loving through hard things.
That is why I was so sad to learn Friday night that Chad took his life. I keep thinking about my conversation with Dori when she thought their marriage might be over and how heartbroken she was not to have him in her life as her partner every day. I remember how happy she was when they started dating again and when they were finally able to heal the wounds and stay together.
Suicide is so tough. Just two months ago, a neighbor who lives a block from us also took his life. He and his wife had been together 25-years since they were sweethearts in high school. Both of these men, Chad (and Danny) were so beloved by our community. They could always be found at events aimed at making Ogden a better place. They were family guys who loved their wives and children. It is hard to see this happen to two beautiful families.
My heart does feel more at peace than it did twelve years ago when Brian's good friend Scott took his life. That was my first experience of losing someone close to me to suicide ever. It took a long time for me to wrap my brain around what had happened. We had been on a couples trip to Moab with Scott and his wife a few months before, and we were preparing to take another couples trip to Moab with them in one week when Scott died. On our trip and the double dates that followed, we had laughed so hard and had such good times together. Like Chad and Danny, Scott was one of the most friendly, easy-going, optimistic and happy people I had known. I always felt great when I was around him. He had four kids between 12-18. How was it possible? I felt like my entire world was turned upside down. The belief I had been taught at that time was that there was no redemption for those who took their own lives. That left me with a very raw feeling inside.
After losing these three amazing men in such a surprising way, it makes me ponder about how we truly never know the sorrows those around us are battling every day. I know that God is a loving God and would never cancel out a life of good deeds based on suicide. My heart is aching for their families and I feel sad thinking about them being in such a dark place in their final moments. But, I am so grateful that they can finally rest and have peace in their souls and pray for those left behind.
I was instantly attracted to Dori's zesty and honest personality. She was so intelligent and had interesting insights on every topic. Chad was one of the most creative people I had met. He was always creating elaborate holiday decorations for their home, themed parties for Weber State University, and their family always had the best Halloween costumes around.
When I met Dori she was working as an independent grant writer for the city while trying to juggle a large and very young family. When she and Chad married, Dori already had a daughter. They decided they would have two more kids together -- which they did in rapid succession. With three children, they felt their family was complete. But, another baby came soon after that. When birth control failed them a second time and their fifth child was born, Dori opted to have her tubes tied. Crazy story is that she somehow conceived a sixth child. Her first daughter was about seven years older than the kids Chad and Dori had together. The five kids they had together were born in seven years and three of them were unexpected.
I am sure it was challenging to balance all of this, but Chad and Dori did it with smiles on their faces, using humor to keep going through the daily struggles and uplifting the people around them all the time.
I know all of this because, as I mentioned before, Dori had a very open and honest personality and shared so many things. She shared the marital challenges that she and Chad had which, quite frankly blew my mind as I learned about all they had been through. At one point when they were separated, we had a conversation during which Dori was gasping for breath and crying so hard. He had done things that I don't know if I could forgive. It was hard for her to forgive too. But, she loved him so much. Instead of being angry, (I'm sure she was angry too), she expressed hurt down to the tips of her toes and just unfathomable anguish at being separated from her soulmate, her true love, her best friend in the entire world.
They made it through some of the toughest struggles I've ever known of married couples to face. They had both had difficult childhoods, and their love for each other as they created a beautiful life for their own family was evident, even if they were not perfect individuals. In fact, the openness and honesty about their imperfections made them all the more endearing in this world where life is so very, very messy and real.
I loved Dori for her cheeky sass and I loved Chad for his kindness. They both had so much positive energy and optimism for life and infectious smiles. I loved their brood of freckle faced kids. I loved their love story that endured all things and fought hard to keep going and to truly forgive and to keep loving through hard things.
That is why I was so sad to learn Friday night that Chad took his life. I keep thinking about my conversation with Dori when she thought their marriage might be over and how heartbroken she was not to have him in her life as her partner every day. I remember how happy she was when they started dating again and when they were finally able to heal the wounds and stay together.
Suicide is so tough. Just two months ago, a neighbor who lives a block from us also took his life. He and his wife had been together 25-years since they were sweethearts in high school. Both of these men, Chad (and Danny) were so beloved by our community. They could always be found at events aimed at making Ogden a better place. They were family guys who loved their wives and children. It is hard to see this happen to two beautiful families.
My heart does feel more at peace than it did twelve years ago when Brian's good friend Scott took his life. That was my first experience of losing someone close to me to suicide ever. It took a long time for me to wrap my brain around what had happened. We had been on a couples trip to Moab with Scott and his wife a few months before, and we were preparing to take another couples trip to Moab with them in one week when Scott died. On our trip and the double dates that followed, we had laughed so hard and had such good times together. Like Chad and Danny, Scott was one of the most friendly, easy-going, optimistic and happy people I had known. I always felt great when I was around him. He had four kids between 12-18. How was it possible? I felt like my entire world was turned upside down. The belief I had been taught at that time was that there was no redemption for those who took their own lives. That left me with a very raw feeling inside.
After losing these three amazing men in such a surprising way, it makes me ponder about how we truly never know the sorrows those around us are battling every day. I know that God is a loving God and would never cancel out a life of good deeds based on suicide. My heart is aching for their families and I feel sad thinking about them being in such a dark place in their final moments. But, I am so grateful that they can finally rest and have peace in their souls and pray for those left behind.
Sunday, April 24, 2016
Surprise San Francisco Birthday Trip
When Brian turned 40, I did some nice things for him. A surprise birthday party with his best friends and his favorite foods. A BBQ at a cabin by Bear Lake with his extended family. When it was all over, I said, "Will you please plan something nice for my 40th Birthday?"
What I meant was that it is nice to feel like someone is thinking about you. Not like it's noon on your birthday and they stop by the store to pick up a gift and start looking into which restaurant they would like to take you to for dinner. But, the really thoughtful-thinking-ahead-it-takes effort kind of thinking.
What he came up with completely exceeded my expectations. He blew it out of the park. It was the sweetest birthday yet.
On my actual birthday, everyone was so nice to me. A friend took me to a beautiful lunch of fancy Italian at Zucca. Sophie and Katie made my favorite dessert, rice krispy treats, while I was at work. I received thoughtful gifts of jewelry, fancy lotions, anti-aging face cream (haha), books and a hipster shirt throughout the day. I even received a delivery of fresh flowers that turned out to be from my good friend who moved to New Mexico.
That evening, we had the most delicious hamburgers, fries and batter dipped mushrooms at Warren's Craft Burger on 25th Street with a table full dear friends. It was a delightful day, start to finish.
The next morning, we packed our bags, sent our kids off to school and headed to the airport for an adventure in San Francisco. I felt lighter than air once the last t was crossed and the last i dotted so we could be on our way. We hadn't taken a trip just the two of us in ages. It was long overdue. It was so fun and relaxing that by the end I joked that we should take all future vacations as just the two of us.
Not really serious about that (but, also, just a tiny bit).
We arrived at our gate at lunch time and shared a $12 veggie salad that was surprisingly delicious for airport food. It was 1pm locally when we landed in Oakland, gathered our things and took the BART downtown. After our things were stowed safely in our hotel, we walked just a few blocks over to Lombard Street and made our way down the crooked part. Then, we explored all over Fisherman's Wharf. The weather was perfect. The bay was gorgeous. We found a darling restaurant with a view of the water where we ate dinner. We returned to our hotel that evening tired and happy in time for surprise number two -- our awesome friends Steve and Heidi were joining us for the weekend!
I don't know how to express how surprising and exciting this was! I had sat next to them the night before at dinner and hadn't had one clue. I guess Brian was planning this with them for months, but to me it felt like they dropped everything and showed up in San Francisco just for my birthday. It was the best.
Friday morning, we all woke up early to eat veggie omlets from a nearby cafe and drive up to the Redwoods at Muir Park. We drove across the Golden Gate Bridge, stopped at a gorgeous lookout to take silly pictures, hiked all through that beautiful forest (and took lots more goofy pictures), walked along a secluded beach and found ourselves in the charming town of Sausalito for lunch. We discovered a fantastic place for burgers for lunch and had ice cream for dessert. We did some window shopping that included a Christmas store that had a tree decorated with mer-men. When I say we had a great time cracking jokes about the mer-men tree, that pretty much sums up our whole extended weekend trip. We had so much fun just hanging out, making each other laugh, and having no responsibilities and nothing on out to-do lists. It was a magical time.
In the afternoon we drove to Twin Peaks, which I didn't think was going to be as awesome as it was. It was a beautiful winding road on the way to the top with incredible houses to look at along the way. From the top, you can see the whole city of San Francisco. It was quite nice.
That evening, we headed in to Chinatown to do some souvenir shopping and to eat awesome Chinese food at the House of Nanking where the waitress barely gives you 10 seconds to order before she runs to the kitchen and starts bringing out food. That restaurant was bustling! It was an interesting and tasty experience.
Saturday morning it rained. Brian and Steve decided they wanted to run from our hotel to the opposite end of the Golden Gate Bridge and back, which was 10 miles total. I took the chance to sleep in and get caught up on some work. We walked to the same cafe we had gone to Friday morning for more delicious breakfast and to decide how we would spend our day.
I had expressed interest in seeing Wicked and Brian had expressed interest in seeing a Giants game. We headed to the theater to see how we could get tickets to the nearly sold out show. Tickets were $135/each, but there was a lottery 2.5 hours before each show for a chance to buy $25 tickets. We entered the lottery for the matinee and our names didn't get picked. But, what we realized when it was over is that if you jump in line right after the last winners are announced they sell all the remaining seats for the night for just $50.
It rained off and on all day Saturday. We walked through the city taking in the sights of the beautiful architecture (and some giant inflatable bunnies in front of city hall). We tried some street food (hummus) and went to Fisherman's Wharf for more street food -- fresh crab, shrimp, clam chowder and fresh baked San Francisco sourdough bread. We walked across the Golden Gate Bridge. We were going to bike but walking was nice too. In the evening, we returned to the theater for another shot at $25 tickets. When that didn't pan out, we managed to get four orchestra seats together for just $50/each -- total steal!
Since it was still 2 hours before the show, we walked to Smitten's for the most unbelievably good ice cream imaginable. I had lemon ginger, but I think Steve's with the fresh mint leaves was my favorite.
It was my first time seeing Wicked. It was, of course, amazing.
Sunday morning, we tried out a new place for breakfast and, although it was slightly more expensive, it deserved all the high praise it had on internet reviews. It was so yummy!
We decided to take in a Giants vs. Dodgers game. Like all big city pro baseball games I've attended, it was really fun. The view of the bay from our seats was fantastic. We ate hot dogs, lemonade and popcorn. Giants won which was an extra bonus.
Steve and Heidi flew out Sunday night so, after the game, we mostly drove around the city, goofing around driving up and down all of those super steep streets and never getting tired of looking at all the beautiful architecture. We drove through the Castro District -- where rainbow flags were flying everywhere and even the crosswalks were painted like rainbows. Then, we drove to the Mission District. It had lots of murals painted on buildings around town and we ended up eating at La Taqueria for dinner.
We bid our friends farewell and headed back to the hotel for our last night, crossing the beautifully lit Bay Bridge on our way.
On Monday I woke up wishing it was Day 1 instead of the end. We had had so much fun and it wasn't over yet.
We decided to ride the Trolley Cars since neither of us had ever done it. Our trolley took us from Fisherman's Wharf to Union Square. The line to get back on the trolley going the other way was long, so we started walking and ended up all the way back at our car. This was the beginning of what would add up to about 13 miles of walking that day (so said Brian's apple watch).
We saw the sea lions at Fisherman's Wharf. We soaked in the sun at Baker Beach. We found a lovely Indian restaurant downtown for lunch when we were finally able to eat (we had to skip breakfast because we had been eating so much wonderful food on our trip we needed a little break). As we were enjoying that tasty meal, I looked over at Brian and felt a little lump in my throat thinking about how sweet he was to do something so out of this world amazing for me for my birthday. I was thinking about how many people in the world would dream about having someone like that, who would be so thoughtful of them. And, there I was! Lucky me. So, I enjoyed that feeling for awhile.
After lunch, we drove to a place called World's End, which turned out to be a beautiful hike to the ocean. We were walking along the path and Brian said, "This is kind of like the trails on the east bench by our house." And, I said, "Yeah, I was just thinking the same thing. Except this is way more green and there is an ocean next to us."
We kept taking pictures throughout the day to keep Steve and Heidi up to date on what they were missing. We had cracked a lot of jokes about "So I Married an Axe Murderer," so we had to visit the spot where the deli scenes were filmed (now a pizza place FYI). We had also joked about visiting a park that has cement slides that we found on a "Free Things To Do in San Fran" list, so we had to go there just to take a photo.
Then, it was done. We turned in the rental car and headed to the Oakland airport. I had another surprisingly delicious salad (maybe airport food is getting better?) and Brian had a pizza because he said the only bad thing about traveling with me is that I can't eat gluten so it limits his pizza opportunities.
We got home in the wee hours of Tuesday morning. It was a trip I will never forget. My surprise San Francisco Birthday Trip that included the bonus Steve and Heidi surprise. LOVED IT!
Now I need to start planning for Brian's 50th :)
The News That Cheered Me Up
At the end of March, I realized something about my third child with one of those wake up in the middle of the night "aha" moments. But, not the good kind. It was an understanding that there is more going on with him than we originally thought (autism) and when the picture came into focus for me I realized that I know too much about this to have not somehow seen it coming. Did I see it coming? When did I first see it coming? I still don't know. I wrote a post all about it, but it is so deeply personal that I don't feel ready to share.
Instead I will just say that this piece of sad news brought me to tears every day for a few weeks as I tried to adjust and reach a place of acceptance. I'm not crying now while I am typing this, so that's good, right?
It was during this difficult time that Brian broke the news to me. About a week before my birthday he revealed that -- He was taking me on a surprise trip to San Francisco!
I could not believe it! Who does that? He had everything planned, airline tickets bought, a hotel reserved right by Fisherman's Wharf. It seemed like he had told everyone I know before he told me.
He had wanted to tell me on the night of my actual birthday and then sweep me away on our flight the next day. Luckily, after seventeen years of marriage, he knows me well enough to think better of that plan. For one thing, it took the whole week to coordinate with both of our parents the care of our children while we were gone (four soccer games in five days. FOUR.). For another, there were three appointments that needed to be rescheduled because they fell during our trip. Also, I guess I am high maintenance because I had to go through every article of clothing and every pair of shoes I own to figure out what I would wear on the trip (and do a little shopping to fill in the gaps). Finally, as every adult knows, when you go on vacation you have to work double time before and after to get all of your work completed because no magic fairy shows up to do it for you while you are gone. For all of these reasons -- I am so glad he told me exactly when he did. But, there is one more: I LOVE the anticipation of things like this almost as much as the trip itself.
So, there you go. A surprise birthday trip that came as close to being swept away last minute as my complicated life and personality will allow.
Instead I will just say that this piece of sad news brought me to tears every day for a few weeks as I tried to adjust and reach a place of acceptance. I'm not crying now while I am typing this, so that's good, right?
It was during this difficult time that Brian broke the news to me. About a week before my birthday he revealed that -- He was taking me on a surprise trip to San Francisco!
I could not believe it! Who does that? He had everything planned, airline tickets bought, a hotel reserved right by Fisherman's Wharf. It seemed like he had told everyone I know before he told me.
He had wanted to tell me on the night of my actual birthday and then sweep me away on our flight the next day. Luckily, after seventeen years of marriage, he knows me well enough to think better of that plan. For one thing, it took the whole week to coordinate with both of our parents the care of our children while we were gone (four soccer games in five days. FOUR.). For another, there were three appointments that needed to be rescheduled because they fell during our trip. Also, I guess I am high maintenance because I had to go through every article of clothing and every pair of shoes I own to figure out what I would wear on the trip (and do a little shopping to fill in the gaps). Finally, as every adult knows, when you go on vacation you have to work double time before and after to get all of your work completed because no magic fairy shows up to do it for you while you are gone. For all of these reasons -- I am so glad he told me exactly when he did. But, there is one more: I LOVE the anticipation of things like this almost as much as the trip itself.
So, there you go. A surprise birthday trip that came as close to being swept away last minute as my complicated life and personality will allow.
Tuesday, April 5, 2016
My 40th Trip Around the Sun
Today is the last day of my thirties.
My pre-birthday gift was getting to take all four of my kids to the zoo. My days getting to hang out with all of them together are limited. It's so strange. Once you get them to the ages where it's not so hard to leave the house, the oldest ones are almost all grown up. We are in a sweet spot right now, but I can already see that the time is fleeting for our group adventures.
It was a beautiful day. Some highlights were seeing "Willow" the baby giraffe running back and forth like a human kid with too much energy; an elephant waved to us with his trunk; a peacock charmed us; monkeys entertained us with their funny gestures; the lions and eagles didn't have to do anything to captivate us with their regality; as always we loved the train and the reptile and small animal house; I coughed up the money for tickets to ride the carousel and loved seeing how excited everyone got about picking their endangered species (I also learned how impressive these carved animals are up close); we spent a long time mesmerized by the sea lions gliding in their glass sided pool. It's hard to sum it up. There were so many gorgeous birds and interesting animals. The kids were delighted, so I was in heaven.
Tomorrow I am 40. I am not super happy about changing from my 30s to my 40s, but what are you going to do? I am grateful to have such a full life.
My pre-birthday gift was getting to take all four of my kids to the zoo. My days getting to hang out with all of them together are limited. It's so strange. Once you get them to the ages where it's not so hard to leave the house, the oldest ones are almost all grown up. We are in a sweet spot right now, but I can already see that the time is fleeting for our group adventures.
It was a beautiful day. Some highlights were seeing "Willow" the baby giraffe running back and forth like a human kid with too much energy; an elephant waved to us with his trunk; a peacock charmed us; monkeys entertained us with their funny gestures; the lions and eagles didn't have to do anything to captivate us with their regality; as always we loved the train and the reptile and small animal house; I coughed up the money for tickets to ride the carousel and loved seeing how excited everyone got about picking their endangered species (I also learned how impressive these carved animals are up close); we spent a long time mesmerized by the sea lions gliding in their glass sided pool. It's hard to sum it up. There were so many gorgeous birds and interesting animals. The kids were delighted, so I was in heaven.
Tomorrow I am 40. I am not super happy about changing from my 30s to my 40s, but what are you going to do? I am grateful to have such a full life.
My four loves.
These two loved being silly all day.
Zoo 2016
Zoo 2016
Sophie pondering her life as a baby elephant.
Ian was a good sport about riding the carousel.
Isaac matched his poison dart frog.
Obviously Katie (in her cheetah ears) wanted to ride the cheetah, but she was super sweet about taking the elephant when another kid jumped on the cheetah right before she could claim it.
We took so many pictures. The kids took tons of cool photos of the animals this time. But, these are the ones I really want to look at forever. These gems of my loves. I'm looking at them now, trying to memorize the way these kids are in this moment before they change again. Love them!
Thursday, March 17, 2016
St. Patrick's Day 2016
I woke up to curl Sophie's hair before taking her to her early morning seminary class and found her dressed from head to toe in green.
"Are you going to make gold coins this year like you always do?" My St. Patrick's Day loving daughter asked. When she and Ian were tiny, I started a tradition of dipping mini Ritz cheese sandwich crackers in melted butterscotch chips to give to the kids from the Leperchaun.
After I returned from taking Sophie to school, I poured bowls of cereal for Isaac and Katie. "I wonder if the Leperchaun turned the milk green?" Katie asked with excitement.
Usually I put a dot of green food coloring in the bottom of their cereal bowls before I pour the cereal, but today I forgot. I grabbed a gallon of milk that was 1/4 full from the fridge and quickly poured some green food coloring in. Just as I was finishing my secret mission, Katie popped her head around the corner and looked at me. I fumbled as I rushed to put the food coloring away and give the milk a shake to mix it.
I brought the green milk in to pour it on their cereal. "Look the Leperchaun did turn the milk green!"
After a few minutes, Katie said, "Mom, I saw you put the food coloring in the milk."
"You caught me--pretending to be the Leperchaun is a game I like to play with you," I said. Then I watched her face very closely to see if she was disappointed or if the wheels of understanding would start spinning in motion. The night Ian caught me being the tooth fairy, he was so upset. As he was taking it in, he paused and said, "Wait, does this mean the Easter Bunny is you too? Oh, no . . . Don't tell me . . . Santa!" And, just like that all of the magic was gone for him. But, he was getting pretty old. He was in the 5th grade already. I was sad for him but I was also thinking, "Hon. You gotta know."
Katie is still young at six. "Are you sad?" I asked. "No," she said. "Did you already know?" I asked. "I think I thought it, but I didn't think about it all the way before now," she said.
Crossing my fingers she doesn't think about it too hard. Happy St. Patty's Day!
"Are you going to make gold coins this year like you always do?" My St. Patrick's Day loving daughter asked. When she and Ian were tiny, I started a tradition of dipping mini Ritz cheese sandwich crackers in melted butterscotch chips to give to the kids from the Leperchaun.
After I returned from taking Sophie to school, I poured bowls of cereal for Isaac and Katie. "I wonder if the Leperchaun turned the milk green?" Katie asked with excitement.
Usually I put a dot of green food coloring in the bottom of their cereal bowls before I pour the cereal, but today I forgot. I grabbed a gallon of milk that was 1/4 full from the fridge and quickly poured some green food coloring in. Just as I was finishing my secret mission, Katie popped her head around the corner and looked at me. I fumbled as I rushed to put the food coloring away and give the milk a shake to mix it.
I brought the green milk in to pour it on their cereal. "Look the Leperchaun did turn the milk green!"
After a few minutes, Katie said, "Mom, I saw you put the food coloring in the milk."
"You caught me--pretending to be the Leperchaun is a game I like to play with you," I said. Then I watched her face very closely to see if she was disappointed or if the wheels of understanding would start spinning in motion. The night Ian caught me being the tooth fairy, he was so upset. As he was taking it in, he paused and said, "Wait, does this mean the Easter Bunny is you too? Oh, no . . . Don't tell me . . . Santa!" And, just like that all of the magic was gone for him. But, he was getting pretty old. He was in the 5th grade already. I was sad for him but I was also thinking, "Hon. You gotta know."
Katie is still young at six. "Are you sad?" I asked. "No," she said. "Did you already know?" I asked. "I think I thought it, but I didn't think about it all the way before now," she said.
Crossing my fingers she doesn't think about it too hard. Happy St. Patty's Day!
Sweet 15
Written Saturday, March 5
Friday, I picked Sophie up from school and took her to lunch at "World Famous Pho" on 25th Street. That is some tasty Vietnamese noodle soup.
As we waited for our food, I grabbed her hand across the table, looked meaningfully into her eyes and said, "Fifteen years ago today, I was as miserable as I have ever been in my entire life." Then, we both started laughing really hard.
I always become sentimental the day before my kids' birthdays, thinking about their births. I usually tell them all the sappy stuff without any details of the misery--like the first time I touched their soft skin or the first time I looked into their eyes. I always tell Sophie the story about how, just a few hours after she was born, she missed me when we sent her to the nursery in the middle of the night and how I thought it was the sweetest thing that a tiny brand new baby could already know her momma from someone else.
I continued -- "I went to the hospital to have you, but my contractions stopped and they sent me home. I was scheduled to be induced on March 6, but the nurses took pity on me and told me I could come back at 5 a.m. the next morning (March 5). It felt like the best news ever! The next day was one of the happiest days of my life! Thank you for making me a mom. Happy Birthday eve!"
After lunch, I took her to her voice lesson and after that we went to see Zootopia. Katie and my mom came to the movie too. Brian was at an overnight scout camp with Ian and Isaac. After the movie, my mom announced that she was making a crab dinner and fudge (the fudge at Sophie's request in lieu of birthday cake) on Sunday in honor of Sophie's birthday.
I turned to Sophie and said, "Wow, this is turning out to be your best birthday ever!" She said, "No, the best birthday was when I turned 12 and dad bought me flowers."
That was a good birthday. She had a big boy/girl party with karaoke.
This year, she asked us to register her for a teen writer's conference in Provo that happened to take place on her birthday (Saturday). Of course, we had to say "yes" even though it meant me driving her and a friend down early in the morning and Brian driving back to Provo to pick her up at night (almost 300 miles of driving with two trips down and back).
Doesn't a writing conference sound so grown up?
I can't believe that we can go get her driver permit any day and she can get behind the wheel of a car. What!? And, she just got hired to work at Lagoon this summer.
Driving, summer job, writer conference. Where does the time go?
Happy day for her--there are flowers from her dad waiting to surprise her when she gets home.
When she was just a tiny girl of five or less, I had a brilliant idea to promise her a "Sweet 16" birthday party if she would not kiss a boy before she turned 16. I described to her a big party and it seemed like such a good idea at the time, to preserve that little girl's sweet innocence.
Little did I know she would be the queen of birthday parties. She always makes elaborate plans. I need to come up with something bigger and better for next year.
And now I record the unabridged story of Sophie's birth (with an emphasis on the miserable parts):
Fifteen years and one day ago, I was so swollen. I had gained 70-pounds and I would lose 30 of it before I checked out of the hospital after giving birth. So. Much. Puffiness. I had high blood pressure (pre-eclampsia) and pre-term labor. I had been dilated to a four for a whole month, thinking I would have my baby any day; having hours of contractions every night that always stopped right before they got down to two-minutes apart.
There have only been a couple of times in my life when I have been as completely spent physically, mentally and emotionally as I was that day.
It was a Sunday and at the end of the day, when the contractions started, I told Brian to take me to the hospital. He said "no" because I was being ridiculous. I was being ridiculous. I was scheduled to be induced Tuesday morning. It seems so irrational now, but in that moment I was filled with desperation and I begged him to take me.
They admitted me and hooked me up to the monitor to confirm that I was indeed in labor! But, an hour later the contractions stopped. I resigned myself. I was defeated once again by those elusive contractions. I was so beaten down. Brian said, "don't worry, it's just one more day." The nurses could read the look on my face I'm sure. Even though they sent me home that night, they promised that I could come back at 5 a.m. to be induced. It was only one day earlier than planned, but I could not have been more thrilled. I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted from my shoulders. Isn't that silly? One day.
We have a video that Brian took of me the next morning as we walked into the hospital. I am grinning from ear to swollen ear. I couldn't wipe that huge sincere smile from my face for anything. It was truly one of the happiest most incredible days of my life.
16-hours of labor, 2.5 hours of pushing, a vacuum and a team of nurses compressing hard on my stomach at the last second to force her shoulders out plus one post delivery emergency D&C and a multitude of stitches later, I had a precious baby in my arms. Despite the trauma of the delivery, it was more joyous than my wildest expectations. So much bigger than anything in my life up until that point. Being a mom is the best. Yesterday, when I reflected on that huge amount of misery I felt getting this beautiful girl here, I thought, "It really is a miracle that we had three more kids!"
I am so glad we did. I love these guys more than anything.
Friday, I picked Sophie up from school and took her to lunch at "World Famous Pho" on 25th Street. That is some tasty Vietnamese noodle soup.
As we waited for our food, I grabbed her hand across the table, looked meaningfully into her eyes and said, "Fifteen years ago today, I was as miserable as I have ever been in my entire life." Then, we both started laughing really hard.
I always become sentimental the day before my kids' birthdays, thinking about their births. I usually tell them all the sappy stuff without any details of the misery--like the first time I touched their soft skin or the first time I looked into their eyes. I always tell Sophie the story about how, just a few hours after she was born, she missed me when we sent her to the nursery in the middle of the night and how I thought it was the sweetest thing that a tiny brand new baby could already know her momma from someone else.
I continued -- "I went to the hospital to have you, but my contractions stopped and they sent me home. I was scheduled to be induced on March 6, but the nurses took pity on me and told me I could come back at 5 a.m. the next morning (March 5). It felt like the best news ever! The next day was one of the happiest days of my life! Thank you for making me a mom. Happy Birthday eve!"
After lunch, I took her to her voice lesson and after that we went to see Zootopia. Katie and my mom came to the movie too. Brian was at an overnight scout camp with Ian and Isaac. After the movie, my mom announced that she was making a crab dinner and fudge (the fudge at Sophie's request in lieu of birthday cake) on Sunday in honor of Sophie's birthday.
I turned to Sophie and said, "Wow, this is turning out to be your best birthday ever!" She said, "No, the best birthday was when I turned 12 and dad bought me flowers."
That was a good birthday. She had a big boy/girl party with karaoke.
This year, she asked us to register her for a teen writer's conference in Provo that happened to take place on her birthday (Saturday). Of course, we had to say "yes" even though it meant me driving her and a friend down early in the morning and Brian driving back to Provo to pick her up at night (almost 300 miles of driving with two trips down and back).
Doesn't a writing conference sound so grown up?
I can't believe that we can go get her driver permit any day and she can get behind the wheel of a car. What!? And, she just got hired to work at Lagoon this summer.
Driving, summer job, writer conference. Where does the time go?
Happy day for her--there are flowers from her dad waiting to surprise her when she gets home.
When she was just a tiny girl of five or less, I had a brilliant idea to promise her a "Sweet 16" birthday party if she would not kiss a boy before she turned 16. I described to her a big party and it seemed like such a good idea at the time, to preserve that little girl's sweet innocence.
Little did I know she would be the queen of birthday parties. She always makes elaborate plans. I need to come up with something bigger and better for next year.
And now I record the unabridged story of Sophie's birth (with an emphasis on the miserable parts):
Fifteen years and one day ago, I was so swollen. I had gained 70-pounds and I would lose 30 of it before I checked out of the hospital after giving birth. So. Much. Puffiness. I had high blood pressure (pre-eclampsia) and pre-term labor. I had been dilated to a four for a whole month, thinking I would have my baby any day; having hours of contractions every night that always stopped right before they got down to two-minutes apart.
There have only been a couple of times in my life when I have been as completely spent physically, mentally and emotionally as I was that day.
It was a Sunday and at the end of the day, when the contractions started, I told Brian to take me to the hospital. He said "no" because I was being ridiculous. I was being ridiculous. I was scheduled to be induced Tuesday morning. It seems so irrational now, but in that moment I was filled with desperation and I begged him to take me.
They admitted me and hooked me up to the monitor to confirm that I was indeed in labor! But, an hour later the contractions stopped. I resigned myself. I was defeated once again by those elusive contractions. I was so beaten down. Brian said, "don't worry, it's just one more day." The nurses could read the look on my face I'm sure. Even though they sent me home that night, they promised that I could come back at 5 a.m. to be induced. It was only one day earlier than planned, but I could not have been more thrilled. I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted from my shoulders. Isn't that silly? One day.
We have a video that Brian took of me the next morning as we walked into the hospital. I am grinning from ear to swollen ear. I couldn't wipe that huge sincere smile from my face for anything. It was truly one of the happiest most incredible days of my life.
16-hours of labor, 2.5 hours of pushing, a vacuum and a team of nurses compressing hard on my stomach at the last second to force her shoulders out plus one post delivery emergency D&C and a multitude of stitches later, I had a precious baby in my arms. Despite the trauma of the delivery, it was more joyous than my wildest expectations. So much bigger than anything in my life up until that point. Being a mom is the best. Yesterday, when I reflected on that huge amount of misery I felt getting this beautiful girl here, I thought, "It really is a miracle that we had three more kids!"
I am so glad we did. I love these guys more than anything.
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