I Love: Being a Mom

I woke up early this morning and pondered about the new little one about to join our lives. It's strange, because even though I've done this three times already, I still feel apprehensive from time to time. You know, the, "How can I possibly love another baby as much as I love my other children?" feeling. Ridiculous, I know. Then, I remind myself that it's just because I don't know her yet. Or, at least, we haven't met in person in this lifetime. Yet.

As I thought about her impending entrance into our world, my thoughts were flooded with memories of Isaac's birth. I remembered how I was hopelessly and so completely taken with that guy from the second I laid eyes on him. It was like that with all of my babies really. But, it was Isaac's first hours with me that I saw on this particular morning. I am having a fabulous time riding out this wave of anticipation. For the first time, it's like I don't want this pregnancy to end. I finally understand that the best gift ever is about to come my way (so much better than my birthday, Christmas and winning the lottery all wrapped up in one moment), and, it is so exciting to look forward to. I don't want the anticipation to end.

I do, however, want the discomfort to end.

Sophie awoke and announced, "Mom, I don't think we are singing to you at church today because we haven't been practicing." I told her that she'd better sing to me. And, her brothers too, or they would all be walking home.

Then, I thought back to a Mother's Day past, one of the first times my little cherubs sang to me in Sacrament meeting. One year Sophie was a sunbeam. The very next year, Ian was a sunbeam, and, there they were, both of my darlings up on the stand all ready to sing love and praises to their mommy! I was beaming with joy. Then, just as the music began, one of them leaned against the other. The other pushed back. And, so it went, a back and forth shoving match that soon escalated into a hitting match while my ear-to-ear smile dropped to a shocked expression and I started wondering if I should intervene. Fortunately, a primary worker stepped in for me and the show went on while Brian and I tried to control our laughter.

This morning, I was showered with all of the homemade cards and gifts that make Mother's Day the best day ever (oh, how I think I will miss the days of the handmade treasures when the kids get older). And, the kids did sing to me. This time with no fighting. I beamed. I swooned every time they looked my way. And, I laughed out loud several times at Isaac who was perched up on a chair by himself dramatically mouthing made up words to the songs.

At one point during Sacrament meeting, I was sitting at the end of the bench all by myself relaxing while all of the kids were piled onto Brian with their coloring books and such. I looked over at them and suddenly thought, "Those are my kids!" And, the thought sunk so deep into my soul (in a way that realizations about the beauties of life rarely do) that I just started to cry. Luckily, right at that moment, Isaac came over to give me a hug, so I was able to temporarily hide my tears by burying my face in his luxurious head of hair. But, of course, hugging him made me cry even harder. And, just when I was feeling mighty embarrassed lest someone should look over at me and wonder why I was sobbing my eyes out (especially if my mascara was running all over), he pulled away and started to head butt me. Just keeping it real. So, I lovingly whispered "You are a stinker!" To which, he loudly proclaimed over and over, "No! You are a stinker!!" So, I'm pretty sure everyone was looking at us by then as I tried to pull myself together.

These are my kids.

I'm so overwhelmingly full of gratitude for them today. And, gratitude to Brian for wanting to have this big family and for being the most fun daddy ever. Being a mom is the best.

I Love: These Two

What a pair. They keep my days interesting and full of joy. Their current obsession is the alphabet -- singing the ABC song, identifying letters everywhere we go, randomly telling me what sounds the letters make, and putting together the ABC train puzzle (and taking it back apart) 300 times per day.

This morning they kept running outside and getting in the van to play. When I'd come out, they would lock the doors and lay on the floor to "hide." Not only could I still see them, but I had keys, so they weren't as stealth as they would have liked to be.

I was finally able to distract them from that game when a friendly stray cat wandered into our yard. I loved seeing their excitement for the next 30-minutes as they watched that feline prowl about. Excitement and curiosity mixed with a tiny bit of fear when kitty came too close.

While I was fixing lunch, they each grabbed two spoons and banged them together. When that got old, they grabbed chopsticks and played them on the table like "drum sticks." When things got a little bit too quiet, I peeked in to see them using the chopsticks to poke holes in the pears in the fruit bowl in the center of the table. They both turned their guilty eyes to me and Izzy quietly and slowly said, "Aya do'ed it."

Izzy went to preschool this afternoon and Isaac took a bath (preschool just isn't his cuppa tea). I peeled myself away from reading blogs and took the time to blow bubbles at Isaac in the tub. I loved his delighted squeals as they stuck to his wet body, floated on the water and popped in his hands. It seems like I did more of that kind of thing when Sophie and Ian were little. Maybe I did, or, maybe those are just the moments that stick in my memory now.

When Izzy came home, we had to do the bubbles again (sans bathtub) and again I was filled with joy watching these two characters chase and pop those iridescent wonders. We had such a fun day reading stories and catching lady bugs. I feel so blessed to get to spend most of my days with these two.

I Love: Brian

I love Brian for so many reasons, but, today, I am especially grateful for the way he has been taking superb care of me in my final days and weeks of pregnancy.

On Saturday, I attended a wedding shower in Logan with my mom while Brian stayed home with all of the kids all day. Not only did he get them to clean up their rooms - he also mopped all of the floors. Apparently, being the BEST floor mopper ever is a special skill he acquired as a teenager working at Wendy's.

As if that weren't enough, Monday morning, as soon as the kids were gone to school, he washed all the dishes and then he scrubbed out the sink so shiny I think I can see myself in it. When we remodeled our kitchen and our bathroom, we kept the old sinks and bathtub because they "looked cool." Unfortunately, being 93-years-old and "looking cool" also equals "extremely hard to clean." I can never get that kitchen sink as clean as I would like and it's times like these, when Brian puts his manly muscles to work for 20-minutes of intense and focused scrubbing, that my sink looks fabulous and I am so grateful!

And, then, he took out the trash.

Yes, I'm sorry if you are feeling full of envy and needing to repent after reading this post. If so, perhaps you should stop now, because it goes on.

I was given a lovely gift certificate to a spa for a pre-natal massage and a deluxe pedicure. Since, I already had an appointment to have my hair done this Friday (I don't want to look gross in the birth pictures, right?), I decided to make a whole day of it -- hair in the morning, spa in the afternoon. And, Brian is keeping Isaac all day long while I bask in the lap of luxury!!! I can hardly wait. I think about it all day every day. Yes, I'm feeling truly spoiled by that hunka hunka husband of mine.

Okay, so he isn't really doing the laundry here. He's making Isaac giggle, which, in my book, is even better.

I Love: Waffles

When I was growing up, we did not own a waffle iron. Oh, sure, we had pancakes, french toast, cinnamon toast and all manner of sugar cereals. It's not as if we were deprived. But, waffles became the novelty breakfast item for me. The only time I got to eat them was when I slept over at my best friend's house. Every time her mother asked us what we wanted for breakfast, I requested waffles. To this day, one of my favorite wedding gifts is still a heart shaped waffle iron we received (I use it for special occasions, we've since added a Belgium waffle maker too).

Recently, my friend Deanne gave me the best waffle recipe ever:

1/4 c. walnuts or pecans
2 c. vanilla soy milk
2 eggs
1 small apple, peeled and cored
1 tbsp. honey
1 tbsp. canola oil

Place walnuts in a blender on high speed until flour-like. Add milk, eggs, apple, honey and oil. Blend on medium speed for two minutes. Meanwhile, preheat the waffle iron and mix the following in a large bowl:

2 cups whole wheat flour
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking powder

Add wet mixture to the dry mixture and mix well. Use about 3/4 cups batter for each waffle. Makes about 6 Belgium waffles.

You can top them however you want, but, my recommendation is honey and cinnamon. Delish! Now, go make waffles for dinner.

I Love: This Bread

Slowly, I am amassing my own hoard of mommy power tools. Two years ago, I got an electric wheat grinder. Recently I added a Kitchen Aid. The wheat grinder and the Kitchen Aid have been a great combo and I've been baking up a storm.

Before getting the Kitchen Aid, I wanted one because everyone l-o-v-e-d theirs. But, I was also kind of thinking, "What is the big deal? Is it really that hard to hold a mixer or knead dough?" Well, now that I've had the Kitchen Aid around, I can see what the big deal is. It's like having another person helping out in the kitchen. And, I'm not talking about a person under the age of five. In fact, this "helper" is also a great source of entertainment and distraction for my under-age-five helpers.

About two years ago, I started baking my own bread off and on. It was yummy, but, difficult to use for sandwiches because it would always fall apart when I would cut it. About two weeks ago, a friend of mine took me to a fabulous whole wheat cooking class and I finally learned how to make awesome bread! It's fluffy and holds together. It's a lot like Great Harvest honey whole wheat.

3 cups hot water (110-120 degrees)
1/3 cup oil
1/3 cup honey or Xagave
1 Tbsp. liquid lecithin (opt.)
2 Tbsp. vital wheat gluten
1 Tbsp. dough enhancer
2 Tbsp. SAF instant yeast
1 Tbsp. salt
6-8 cups freshly milled whole wheat flour

In the mixing bowl add water, oil, honey (or, Xagave) and lecithin. Don't mix. Add four cups of flour. Don't mix. On top of the flour, add wheat gluten, dough enhancer and yeast. Do not add the salt yet. "Jog" in the mixture by switching it on and off quickly to combine ingredients. Then, mix on speed 2 until smooth. Let stand for about 10 minutes (until dough has doubled in size). Then add the salt and mix it in. Finally, add the remaining 2-4 cups of flour 1/2 cup at a time. The dough will seem very sticky. When it doesn't stick to a lightly floured finger, stop adding flour (it will seem like it's not enough flour and too sticky, but, stop anyways and it will be better). Mix for 10 more minutes on speed 2. Coat hands with shortening and form into 3 small or 2 large loaves. Place in greased loaf pans. Let rise until doubled -- 30-40 minutes. Place into a cold oven (don't preheat) and bake at 350 degrees for 35 minutes.

** Note, I like to make two medium size loaves and use the extra dough for cinnamon rolls, monkey bread or pizza crust.

I Love: Blossoms

For weeks, I've been noticing every tree dressed up in spring blooms and pointing them out to the kids. My favorites are the Magnolia trees -- which seem to be everywhere this year. I've been loving the crocuses, the early tulips and the daffodils. At last, my own tulips bloomed just this week. Every time I pull into my driveway, I gasp at their beauty. I'm so glad I planted tulips a few years ago. They have to be the easiest flower to keep alive. And, year after year, they come back. They even multiply. I've quite forgotten about all of the improvements I've been wanting to make the the outside of our home. These tulips take my mind far away from all of that to a display of magic and beauty.

This morning I walked Ian to school with the sun warming my back. This weather makes me feel optimistic, happy and content. Even on the cold days, there is the promise of more warm days just around the corner. I've been enjoying this spring so much, especially because it's been a bit cooler than usual -- I have the nice compensation of being a little overly warm this year.

Two nights ago, a storm rolled in. The kids and I were taking out the trash when we looked up to see gray covering the sky. I love rain storms! We sat on the porch and enjoyed the sounds and smells as we watched the drops fall and intensify the colors of everything.

"Don't you love the smell of the rain?" I said to Sophie. "I love the pitter patter sound of the drops coming down," she replied. I love that she said that. Maybe we really should never leave this house. It's so fun to enjoy storms from the front porch with the kids.

I felt so happy as I walked Ian to school this morning that I reached out and grabbed his hand. I love that he is proud to hold his hugely pregnant mom's hand while he walks to school. I love this Kindergarten year of my children's lives. So sweet is their childhood innocence.

I Love: Tea Parties

Let it be known that among her impressive collection of tiny dishes, Paula also has beautiful tiny plates. But, these white rabbit plates seemed perfect for the Mad Hatter theme. Do you love her tiny salt and pepper shakers? And, the matchstick carrots in the dip?
Izzy drinking her tiny daiquiri with its little umbrella.

Sugar and Spice Cake.

A sampling of the itty-bitty food.

Hooray for girls!

Earlier this month we took my mom to A Spot of Tea for a tea party.

My "mad scientist/magician."

Sophie and Mammas modeling their hats.

Pouring tea with a raspberry lemonade moustache.

Back in January, my mom hosted a Mickey Mouse birthday tea party for all of her grandkids at her house. When the kids first arrived, they got to wrap up gifts for Mickey (gifts that they later took home for themselves). They ate tiny food off of tiny dishes at her little table. The meal was topped off with hot chocolate, whipped cream and sprinkles. The kids had so much fun!





The birthday man himself.